OMG.

[fenderlove]

I'm having a panic attack literally. Oh, Lord, give me the strength not to smite the people I live with. Lousy frickin' bastards. The R.A. didn't know I was home, and I got to hear her lie to the other roommates about what I said in my emails. She said that I was jealous of her hanging out with the other two. I walked right out there and told her off. She instantly starts trying to shirk blame saying, "That's what you said in your email!" And I was like, "It was not! Do you want me to go get them right fucking now?!" She said, "Well, that's what it sounded like." Can she not fucking read?! Oh, my God. Then she wants some fucking sympathy from everyone because I was being mean. She's a fucking liar, and I'm going to the A.C. when she gets back from vacation. This will stop. I will not have it in my house. I'm losing my mind. I think I really am. I think that I'm losing all grip with sanity living in this house. Coping is not something I'm able to do at the moment. I just feel like everything's falling apart; this isn't senioritus- this is the whole world conspiring against me to try and make me lose it finally. I wish this panic attack would stop 'cause I can't breathe and I'm having some weird muscle spasms in my stomach. My nerves have finally been shot to hell, I think.