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Ooh-ho-ho, so you think you've had bad roommates? Let me illuminate on the veracity of my former situations. If you've read this before, I apologize, but I present it again for this LJ prompt (plus I needed to update it to include my final semester in school).
Fenderlove and the Horrible College Flat-mate (and the 4 Unfortunate Sequels)!
The following was posted on my blog back in 2008 right before my final semester in college.
Fenderlove and the Horrible College Flat-mate (and the 4 Unfortunate Sequels)
It's no secret amongst my real-life pals that I've had the worst luck when it comes to roommates and flat-mates. I seem to get stuck with people who are absolutely wretched. Here's some highlights of the four years of hellish roommates I've had.
Freshman Year- Double Occupancy Dorm Room with Private Bathroom
R. was my first and only "room"mate. We lived in a double occupancy room at a small hippie college; I thought I had lucked out- we were the only people on the entire campus with a private bathroom. For the first few weeks it was great, and then R. turned psycho. She was and is the nastiest person I've ever known. She never showered for the first semester until her parents (rich yuppies who were big hippies in their own time before they got their trust-funds and are now conservative big wigs) came to visit. After said shower, there was a dark greasy film in the bathroom floor which she refused to clean. During this rather unpleasant semester, she never wore feminine hygiene products- she just wore skirts all the time and let blood ooze down her legs and onto the carpet (yes, she went to classes this way). She didn't brush her teeth or her hair ever; she walked around the dorm nude and sat on chairs that we all had to share; she pissed in her bed and just let the mattress fester, and she stole food from other people even though she received a $3000 a month allowance. She defecated on the toilet seat (she sat on it backwards because sitting the proper way is conforming to "social norms"), and worst of all expected me to clean it because I was "on scholarship and [her] parents paid full price!" When I refused to clean up her feces, she just left it there. I couldn't use my own bloody bathroom for over a month because of it; finally, one of the other people in the dorm cleaned it up out of pity for me. And to end this part of my story on another R. excrement moment, she video-taped herself going to bathroom and tried to force me to watch it. She stuck the camera in the toilet while she relieved herself, set the video to techno music, and turned the tape in as her final project for a sculpture class (she called it a "life sculpture"). Not only did she receive an A for this "project," she received a grant from the college to do a sculpture for the school grounds (but one not made of human fecal matter). She bought $5000 on dead grass, the kind used on hula skirts, and piled it up in the middle of the campus lawn and let the wind carrying it all over the place. She was praised for her "brilliant and innovative evolving sculpture." The groundskeepers were less thrilled than the art professors. I transferred to a different school.
Sophomore Year- Private Room in Women's Dormitory, Communal Bathroom.
This year was the closest I came to not having to share my living space with people, and so is the shortest tale. This was the first year at the college I transferred to and was very happy not to have to deal with sharing a sleeping space with anyone else. Unfortunately, I had the neighbor from hell that I had to share a bathroom with. B. was a heavy sleeper which was very unfortunate for me. You see, B. slept so heavily that she needed three alarm clocks, her cellphone alarm, and her TV alarm to wake her up, and to make sure that she was up on time, she would have them go off at 4AM so that she would be sure to wake up at some point before 10AM to get ready for class. All five alarms would go off at max volume for HOURS before she finally woke up. I tried several times to call the front desk to wake her up, but apparently she couldn't hear the phone due to all her alarms. But loudness was the least of the problems I had from B. She lived in the dorms, but she was the mother of four small children, which obviously couldn't live in the dorm with her (the school does have family housing). Her kids stayed with her mother who lived twenty minutes away, and sometimes they would come and visit her at the dorm, which I never had a problem until they started spending the night there. Babies crying at all hours during the night and her three year old son liked to roam around female-only bathroom peeping under shower doors and bathroom stalls. I never complained about it until finals week when she started smacking her son around in the hallway and locked him out of her room. The kid wandered up and down the hallway banging on everyone's door at 3AM, screaming that he was hungry. I called the police. I'm not sure what happened next except that the police knocked on her door and there was a lot of belligerent screaming and then she left and didn't come back for two days. When she did come back, she left a note on my door threatening to kill me because I was nosy and that I must hate her because she was a "rocker." Note was handed over to campus security, and she was kicked out of the university housing system. I decided apartment life was the way to go.
Junior Year- On-Campus 4-Person Apartment, Private Bedroom, 2 Shared Bathrooms.
I thought my problems would be solved when I moved into an apartment! Man, was I wrong! I first shared an apartment with T., K., and M. One of my sorority sisters had lived in the apartment before I did with the others, and she said they were all really nice. Everything went great for the first month until M., with whom I shared a bathroom, started knocking on my door every two seconds needing me to tell her how to fix her life. She was on every kind of medication available, had a really horrid family life, and didn't seem to be able to pick friends who wouldn't try to use her in some way. I felt awful for her and tried to be there for her as much as possible, but it got to the point where I couldn't go home. She would be standing at my bedroom door, crying and needing me to tell her what to do with her life. I honestly didn't know what to do; everything I suggested made her more and more upset. I tried introducing her to my friends, but it's really hard for people to warm up to you if you always start a conversation with "Do you ever wonder what it would feel like to die? Don't you just want to just die?" I suggested that she see the school's counseling service, and she did. They recommended that she spend 72 hours in observation at the local hospital's psych ward, and she did.
During the 72 hours that she was gone, K. got a new boyfriend would wanted to stay the night (which was against the apartment policy rules). He would bring his friend over, and while he stayed the night in K.'s room, his friend would sleep in his underwear on our couch. It made me uncomfortable, but I just kept my door locked and hope she would find a boyfriend without a third wheel. Well, when M. came home after her hospital visit, she was unaware of the "house guest." So when she opened the front door late in the night and a very large man in his underwear jumps out of the shadows and starts screaming at her, she was understanding freaked out. She ran to her room and dialed 911, which resulted in campus police, three resident advisors, and the real police showing up. When M. was finally assured that it was safe, she came out of her room to explain what happened. She was embarrassed and confused. T., K., and K's boyfriend decided to make an appearance at that point, and K. proceeded to go ballistic. She called M. a host of very rude names and threatened to "slit [her] throat." Normally, an out and out threat like that in front of police and resident advisors is a sure way to get kicked out of the campus housing system, but once she was reprimanded, K. turned on the waterworks, claimed to be a Freshman who didn't know any better (she was a Junior at the time), and got off scott free. M. moved to another dorm, where she went off her meds, never left her room, failed all her class, lost her scholarships, and was booted out of school.
Until the end of the semester, I had a bathroom all to myself and was left mostly alone. At the start of the new semester, C. moved into M.'s old room. She was an alcoholic 18 year old who cared more about her hair than her own safety. While suffering from alcohol poisoning and vomiting everywhere, she still insisted her friends take her clubbing even though she couldn't hold herself up on her own two feet. I had to clean up all the vomit. I applied for a new apartment at the end of the semester.
Senior Year- On-Campus 4-Person Apartment, Private Bedroom, 2 Shared Bathrooms (a different one)
I thought I had it made that year because I was living with a resident advisor. I was right!... For the first semester. No one was ever home but me. The resident advisor was always out working, one flat-mate lived at home and just used her room as a storage bin, and the other flat-mate never showed up so I didn't have to share my bathroom with anyone! Yay! But that peace would soon end.
At the end of that Fall semester, the resident advisor moved out and was replaced with another one; I'll call her N. N. didn't want to be a resident advisor; she hated the job, but needed the money for school plus the bonus of free housing. This made her quite bitter. She liked to invite her boyfriend and tons of her friends over for parties, ignoring the rules of the housing agreement because she could, and ranting at me if she thought I had broken any. She couldn't take care of herself. She didn't buy a garbage can for the kitchen, so she just used a box she found which she filled up with rotting food garbage. Finally, after the smell and infestation of gnats was more than I could bear, I had one of my sorority sisters help me move the box into the dumpster outside... which caused a thousand more gnats to fly out and attack us. Her friends ate my foods, used the bathroom I had to clean and left it a mess, and were extremely loud, obnoxious, and rude. Still, I thought I could deal with her for a semester because I still had my private bathroom... and then the others came.
P., who had been using her room for storage, got a boyfriend and needed a place where they could be "alone." I liked her boyfriend; he was polite and funny and was a great tattoo artist, but when he literally moved into our apartment it got a little much. He had a OCD and cleaned all the time, which normally would be a good thing, but finding a strange tattooed man skulking on your bathroom floor in his underwear with a rag and a can of Lysol can be a bit disconcerting. Still, I liked him better than N.'s friends, even if I had to put up with his and P1's loud sexcapades. However, there came a day when both P., her boyfriend, N's and all her friends were in the house, during which time I left to get fresh air only to return hours later to find my bathroom a mess- dirty feminine products in the floor and blood and pubic hair on the toilet seat. I put a sign on the door explaining that unless the others in the apartment were willing to clean the bathroom and pay for the cleaning supplies, then they were not allowed in the bathroom. The next day one of N's snotty friends is banging on my door asking me why I have to be such a bitch; I explain to him how I found the bathroom the day before and how I should not be forced to clean up someone else's biohazard. I also explained how if they had asked me first before using the bathroom or at least cleaned up after themselves, I wouldn't have minded them being in there (after all, if they had been courteous and respectful of my space to begin with I would have never have known they were in there in the first place). I thought that settled the matter. However, the next day, I got back from classes and my bathroom was wrecked- my hairbrush was in the toilet, all my shampoo, toothepaste, soap, and mouth wash was poured into the bathtub, my shower curtain was ripped up, and someone had pissed in the floor. My toothbrush looked suspiciously untouched, so I threw it away along with everything else. I told N. that if she didn't do something about what happened that I was going to report her to the Dean of Housing, not only for failing in her duties as an resident advisor, but also for destroying property and giving out her keys to non-apartment residents (a violation of the housing agreement). Her solution to the matter was to blame P. and her boyfriend for the whole thing, resulting in them moving out and thinking that I blamed them. I felt awful about it and never got to explain what really happened. The only good thing that happened after that was that N. stopped bringing her friends over and was never around. I got the apartment back to myself, but not the way I wanted it. I applied to live in the same apartment because N. said she didn't want to be a resident advisor anymore which means she can't live there.
So that's my story thus far. I still have one more semester to go (due to my transferring from another college putting me behind in the graphic design program at the university I go to now). I have the fear about who my new flat-mates will be. I just want someone who follows the housing agreement and is respectful of my space and the shared living space just as I am respectful of it and their space. Is that so much to ask?
And here is the updated bit about my final semester in university and the hell I endured. I cobbled it together from various posts I made during that time.
The Final Chapter (I Hope)...- the same apartment as the last one listed above.
- Xander may be a demon magnet, but I'm a bad room-mate magnet. The R.A. is drunk with power! I don't have time to explain everything (I've gotta get ready for class and Seth would kill me for being late), but let's just say that the R.A. called my mom around 10PM and demanded my cellphone number. My mom, thinking something might be wrong, gave it to her. This was not an emergency situation (I missed the first floor meeting 'cause I slept through it which lots of people do); she misrepresented herself in calling like that as well as violated MTSU's privacy policies by trying to obtain said information. She duct-taped something to my door in a childish manner then lied about doing it, and she's generally gone mad because I'm "inconsiderate" for the simple fact that I didn't rush into the new other room-mates' rooms the second they moved in to try and "make friends" with them. I'm twenty-three fucking years old! I have my own friends, and I definitely don't have time for this bullshit! Apparently, having Sarah and Tara in my room makes me "anti-social." I'm not anti-social; I just don't like you, R.A. person, for you bullying and bad attitude. I swear to God I will not be pushed around by a Sophomore.
I do get a little revenge though 'cause my mother is so pissed off about being woken up and made to worry last night by the R.A. that she's reporting her to the Housing Department. XD
- Had to meet with the director of all the R.A.s on campus and tell my side of the story. Found out that the R.A. not only claimed that I threw her hair-straightener in a sink full of water and broke it (a hair-straightener she's still using and that I have a picture of), she also claimed that I threw out all of her food from the fridge and that I stocked it full of my stuff so that she and the other roommates can't put anything in there (also that I took a picture of). The director said that our stories have too many differences so she wants to meet with both of us on Thursday, so we can basically argue with each other in front of her, I guess. The R.A.'s story's already changed a bunch of times, but they won't do anything to her. I don't want to go to this meeting (as I should be working on my comic and getting ready for Dragon*Con fun), but I know I have nothing to worry about since I know that I'm the one telling the truth. I wish it could wait until after D*C because I would rather have my James!fog to cheer me up rather than going to D*C all gloomy. My blood-pressure's way up from all this stress, and I'm somewhat sleep deprived. I hate this all together because there is no solution besides the R.A. agreeing not to speak to me nor knock on my door ever again. I don't even want to look at her.
-These are photographs I took of the apartment to document my side of what's going on with the R.A. Enjoy the batshit insanity for yourselves.
Exhibit One: The Flat Iron.
This is the flat iron that the R.A. claimed that I broke by dumping it into a sink full of water over the weekend. This photo was taken Tuesday afternoon. Note how she was still using it. I certainly wouldn't use an electrical appliance that had been dumped into water. I did not touch her flat iron at all (note the all-too-subtle message about NOT TOUCHING her flat iron).
Also note the way the flat iron precariously teeters near the edge of the counter top and how the cord is just strewn in the floor. That's safety right there! It also makes it a breeze to brush one's teeth.
Exhibit One Point One: The Countertop. All of this stuff belongs to the R.A. save the Milk and Honey handsoap which is mine keeps mysteriously moving about the counter during the day.
Exhibit Two: The Fridge. The R.A. claimed that I took up all the space in the fridge and threw all her stuff away. The items highlighted in purple are mine (note that there is space behind them). My items were added to the fridge on Friday and this is exactly how it appeared then which my mother can attest to because she was helping me unpack. Who does that other stuff belong to? I know a lot of it was in the fridge when I moved in, and since the other roommates weren't there, I can only deduce it is the R.A.'s. I don't need to keep a lot of stuff in the fridge as I have a mini-fridge in my room.
Exhibit Two Point One: The Fridge Door. None of this stuff is mine.
Exhibit Two Point Two: The Freezer. Again, none of this stuff is mine.
Exhibit Three: My cabinet. This is the only cabinet in the whole of the kitchen, including pantry, that I use. However, the R.A. still claims that I am "taking over the house."
- I'm having a panic attack literally. Oh, Lord, give me the strength not to smite the people I live with. Lousy frickin' bastards. The R.A. didn't know I was home, and I got to hear her lie to the other roommates about what I said in my emails. She said that I was jealous of her hanging out with the other two. I walked right out there and told her off. She instantly starts trying to shirk blame saying, "That's what you said in your email!" And I was like, "It was not! Do you want me to go get them right fucking now?!" She said, "Well, that's what it sounded like." Can she not fucking read?! Oh, my God. Then she wants some fucking sympathy from everyone because I was being mean. She's a fucking liar, and I'm going to the A.C. when she gets back from vacation. This will stop. I will not have it in my house. I'm losing my mind. I think I really am. I think that I'm losing all grip with sanity living in this house. Coping is not something I'm able to do at the moment. I just feel like everything's falling apart; this isn't senioritus- this is the whole world conspiring against me to try and make me lose it finally. I wish this panic attack would stop 'cause I can't breathe and I'm having some weird muscle spasms in my stomach. My nerves have finally been shot to hell, I think.
- Where's Spike when you need him? I could use some of his skills right now. Seriously. I'm in such a state at the moment that I don't know what to do! I have like four projects due next week that are huge, and I can't get any work done in the labs because I never get any work done there, and I can't get any done at home because I feel like a prisoner and it makes me six kinds of frantic. JMTV still needs to be finished, but I'm so stressed! OMG!
THE SAGA WITH THE R.A. CONTINUES.
Here's how all this began: 1. R.A. wanted to have a "house meeting," but I couldn't make it because I had class so I told her as much. I told her I would let her know a time when I could meet. 2. Instead of waiting for me to tell her when a time was convenient, she rescheduled the meeting the very next night. I told her ahead of time, "Look, I'm going to be in the lab working on Senior Project tonight. I will not be home until late." I also asked her what the meeting was about and she refused to tell, hemming and hawing around the issue. 3. Cue gigantic message scrawled on our mirror in EXPO about how she needs to know right this second when I can meet. 4. The emails began.
My email to the R.A.
Dear Amber,
My schedule is extremely hectic at the moment. Tomorrow I will be in class from 6AM straight until 9PM, and after that I will be working in the silkscreen studio, so I'm not sure when I will be home (for the past two nights, I've been in the labs until 1AM, so I expect it will be around then). I have three very large projects due next week, so I will be in and out of the apartment all weekend going to the labs/studios. I cannot skirt this studio time with these looming deadlines and I have no way to plan how long things will take me or how long I will need to be out. Definitely, the earliest I will be available for more flexible hours is Thursday and Friday of next week.
If the matters that need to be discussed at the house meeting are of an extremely pressing nature, please let me know and I will try to make some arrangements though I cannot make any set promises. However, if what needs to be discussed is not urgent, I really need to be concentrating on my assignments and studio time. Two of my projects that are due next week are group projects, and I owe it to my classmates to pull my share of the work, so it is vital to my grade and theirs that I show the proper and equal amounts of participation as everyone else.
I hope we can work something out soon.
Sincerely,
Savanna
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The R.A.'s reply in all its unpunctuated glory. Notice how she carefully doesn't really answer my question about how vital the matters are.
Savanna,
well the meeting will take like 5 mins, nothing too long and we do not need to keep putting this off or things will just get worse.... there are things that need to be brought to everyones attention, as well as info that you need to know..
please let me know when you can talk to us... this week would be great...
------------------
My reply to the R.A.'s reply in which I once again ask what the meeting is about.
Dear Amber,
I really do not have time this week, and if it's something that will only take five minutes, then I cannot believe that it is something that is urgently necessary. I'm very sorry, but with my graduation pretty much depending on these classes, I hope you can understand why my priorities lie elsewhere. I'm not sure what's being going on that has turned into a dire situation. If it's about the housemate agreement thing, if you give me a copy, I can fill it out when I can and give it back to you. All I ask is that no one touch my property, i.e. food in the kitchen or my toiletries as these are the only items I keep in the common areas of the apartment, and thus far, no one has done that. If this meeting is only a sit-down meet & chat situation, then I really cannot make special arrangements for that. I'm on a tight schedule and am home for maybe three to five hours at a time, and that is the time I use for sleeping, eating, and showering.
Again, I'm very sorry. I will let you know a definitive time I can meet with you as soon as I'm sure that I will be available because I do not want you to have to keep scheduling meetings that it is impossible for me to show up for, thus taking up your time and the time of others.
-Savanna
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The R.A.'s reply in which she yet again refuses to tell me what the meeting is about as well as the fact of calling me a liar about being busy because I come home to fucking sleep for three hours before I have to get up and work again.
i think that having this meeting is necessary. its not about "chatting" but about somethings that the room mates and i feel like need to be brought to everyones attention. as for the room mate agreement forms.... those are to be filled out with one another present, that way we all know your wishes on things. i do not have those forms yet but they are on their way.
i feel that 5 mins is not alot of time but that can clear up a few issues. i know that school comes first, as it should. however we have seen you come and go. and sometimes stay. you could have talked to us the few times that you have came in... i understand..... we are willing to try to find a time that is good for you. and this meeting is not pointless! i promise!
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My reply in which I ask YET AGAIN about what the meeting is about and ask why she thinks it's fair that the other roommates know yet I am not allowed to know.
I will let you know when a time is convenient. I did come in today during the day as I forgot my Astronomy lab manual, but I left right after grabbing it. I was already running late and had to catch the bus when it was coming back around. I was also on the phone with my mother while you three were in the kitchen, so I was a bit preoccupied, so forgive me for not interrupting your conversation. As for any issues that are going on, I have to ask what are they? I have no idea, but it seems like you and the others have something definitive to talk about. I feel strangely out of the loop; I do not think that it is intentional, but when I have asked what this meeting is about, the issues that need discussing seem to be hedged around. There is nothing that can be discussed that can't be written, and I would just like a little forewarning. How can I deem the appropriateness of where this meeting should fall in my priorities if I can't know what it's about?
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The R.A.'s reply in which she gets desperate.
somethings are just better said in person. i think that it would be the best thing. i do not want to share over email. i thin kin person would be best. i hope you understand .....
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My reply in which I threaten to get the higher-ups in the housing staff's attention if I am not told what the hell is going on.
I'm very sorry, but I don't understand. If you and the other two roommates are aware of these matters, why am I the only one not allowed to know? If these issues are of such a grave nature, it might be best to have a third party present. This sounds like a very serious matter, and I think it might be best if the A.C. was a mediator again. I'll check my schedule, and then I'll see when there's a time that she can meet with all of us as a group.
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The R.A.'s reply in which my threat apparently was the only way to get her to answer a simple. fucking. question!!!1!
its nothing that the A.C needs to be involved. she is on vacation.
they want to talk about food issues and air conditioner changing...and stuff like
that...
and maybe to try to get to know you. i am not sure.
let me know , ok
------------------
My reply in which I lay down the law and bring the hammer down... the hammer is not my metaphorical penis.
Amber,
Food and air conditioning? That's what couldn't be said in an email? Well, that's all you had to tell me. You made it seem like there was something seriously wrong, and I must say it is highly suspect when one asks what a meeting is about several times and is basically refused an answer.
The earliest I can meet is Wednesday (October 1st) at 7PM, no earlier/no later. I will give the five minutes you requested, but I have to leave right after to go back to the silkscreen lab as I have a project due on Thursday in that class (as well as an assignment in astronomy and a ten page paper due in Senior Project which I hope to get done this weekend but who knows). It might save some time for everyone to just say that I haven't and do not touched the thermostat, and it's fine where it is now. As for food, I don't want people touching my food, I don't touch other people's, and I haven't had any kind of problems with people in my things. And as far as getting to know me, I don't see why that is on the itinerary. Something like that would take much longer than five minutes, and also, should I not be involved in the decision who "gets to know" me? Is that not my right? The whole thing makes me uncomfortable as I am none of anyone else's concern. The food and air conditioning may be of some consequence, but "getting to know" me is an unimportant, frivolous, and wholly unnecessary enterprise and a poor excuse to deprive me of my studio time.
If 7PM on Wednesday is a problem, please let me know. The next time I could possibly meet is Friday (October 3rd) at 6PM.
- Savanna
--------------------
The main problem is that these are the types of girls who don't want to be my friend, they have no interest in being my friend, and have no interest in getting to know me, which if absolutely perfectly fine because I have no interest in being their friend or getting to know them. BUT! They can not understand that I don't want to be their friend. After all they are pretty, popular types! How dare I NOT want to be THEIR friend! *insert flounce here* So this whole meeting is a set up, and I refuse to be dragged down by this. I'm twenty-three fucking years old, I have my own friends and my own life, and I don't need this bullshit! I'm thinking about walking in and saying "Hello, my name is Savanna. I watch a lot of gay vampire porn, and I can fantasize about James Marsters naked constantly."
- Well, here's to hoping that the saga between the R.A., myself, and the roommates is over.
The R.A.'s reply to the email in which I laid the hammer down yet she's still not getting how her email was both offensive to my sensibilities and manages to try and turn this whole thing around into something about me disliking THEM. She also missed the point that I stated that I wasn't having any problems and that no one had been touching any of my stuff.
i apologize if you feel that way...i understand if you dont want to get to know
us. we just kinda want to get to know you since we all live together. i will let
everyone know your answers to the whole food and air thing. i think some
things are ust better said in person.
so i will pass it along and there is not need to have a meting......
if you get this paper done, does that mean you get to graduate at christmas?
that must be exciting! i can not wait until senior year! its going to be great! you
must be excited!!
oh and one last thing.....no one is going to touch your food and you personal
stuff.... someone just had been eating others people stuff and that was really
the issue.... but i will let everyone know to only touch their stuff......
oh and i love the thing you put on your door..... its nice to know what you are up
too!! i love it! and you are so busy!!! i never see you anymore..... [Fender would like to add: The R.A. is referring to a dry erase sign I bought for my door to denote my comings and goings since she seems to think I am in my room when I am not, which I should not have to do but it seems necessary since she keeps harping that I'm in my room and won't come out when I'm actually across campus at the lab or in class. >__<]
hope classes are going great for you and that you get the project and
assignments done!! good luck and let me know if you need anything or of there
is anything that i can do for you.
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My reply in which I desperately try to make her understand that it has nothing to do with my feelings towards them and has everything to do with the accusatory treatment I have received since living here (and how if she had been open and honest about the whole situation in the first place, we could have avoided all this stress).
Amber,
I feel that getting know one another cannot be forced nor can it happen in a
short period of time. It happens at random and is more gradual. Unfortunately, I
will most likely only be here for another two months, and all of my focus and
attention must go to school. It is not that I do not want to get to know any of
you; it's that the situation was never presented that way to me. Let me explain
my apprehension- the "meeting" was described as a chance for the three of you
to discuss things that you all have already been in talks about with me. If these
matters have already been discussed amongst the three of you before I was
even aware of any kind of problem, and I have been left out of the loop to the
point where I was never consulted as to even the time of the meeting before it
was arranged in the first place, it appears to me that each one of you have
probably made up your minds about the outcome of said meeting. I will not be a
scapegoat because I am the one who is at home the least. I've been down that
road before in this apartment, which is why I choose to keep to myself and why I
must concentrate so hard on my studies.
As far as my senior project, this ten page paper is only the beginning of the
project itself. Everything I've been working on thus far has been a group project
to design the overall theme of show, the print material (posters, postcards,
vinyls, etc), and the show's website, which is why I was gone all last week. I was
in the computer lab until 1AM every night working with the others to finish the
website- writing action script, javascript, html and css and designing the flash,
taking the photographs, and making logos. I was the only person who knew
how to write the css, so it was very stressful because people kept changing
their minds about what they wanted. And now I have to start work on my own
project for the show itself. Each person has an individual project to complete
which requires 8 pieces (website, posters, etc). It's all a huge undertaking with
only a month and a half left to complete it. Plus, there's a portfolio review in
October that I have to prepare for and all my other classes. I just wanted to
explain to you that I am not trying to avoid anyone or anything, but that when I
said that I didn't have time last week that I truly, truly meant it.
Sincerely,
Savanna
-----------------
The R.A.'s reply in which she tries to be a friendly, caring person while avoiding having to address the fact that I caught her and the others trying to pull me into a set up.
wow you really are busy,,, its no big deal, i just wanted all of us to talk.. the other
two girls knew each other... and now i am getting to know them.. they are great
girl! but i understand where you are coming from and how you feel.....
im always here, if you need anythign...good luck with all that school work...you
seem to be very focused...so good luck and i hope it all goes well
-------------
RAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!1!!!! *pulls hair out* Why can't they just leave me alone?! I swear, I just want to be left to myself and finish out these next two months. College is not a girl scout meeting! I do not have to be friends with them! What is wrong with these people?! What the hell does it take!?
And it continued on all semester with the three of the other apartment-mates being absolute bitches to me and fighting with their boyfriends obnoxiously. I couldn't wait to get out of there. I didn't even tell them I was leaving.
I want to be a hermit.
Ooh-ho-ho, so you think you've had bad roommates? Let me illuminate on the veracity of my former situations. If you've read this before, I apologize, but I present it again for this LJ prompt (plus I needed to update it to include my final semester in school).
Fenderlove and the Horrible College Flat-mate (and the 4 Unfortunate Sequels)!
The following was posted on my blog back in 2008 right before my final semester in college.
Fenderlove and the Horrible College Flat-mate (and the 4 Unfortunate Sequels)
It's no secret amongst my real-life pals that I've had the worst luck when it comes to roommates and flat-mates. I seem to get stuck with people who are absolutely wretched. Here's some highlights of the four years of hellish roommates I've had.
Freshman Year- Double Occupancy Dorm Room with Private Bathroom
R. was my first and only "room"mate. We lived in a double occupancy room at a small hippie college; I thought I had lucked out- we were the only people on the entire campus with a private bathroom. For the first few weeks it was great, and then R. turned psycho. She was and is the nastiest person I've ever known. She never showered for the first semester until her parents (rich yuppies who were big hippies in their own time before they got their trust-funds and are now conservative big wigs) came to visit. After said shower, there was a dark greasy film in the bathroom floor which she refused to clean. During this rather unpleasant semester, she never wore feminine hygiene products- she just wore skirts all the time and let blood ooze down her legs and onto the carpet (yes, she went to classes this way). She didn't brush her teeth or her hair ever; she walked around the dorm nude and sat on chairs that we all had to share; she pissed in her bed and just let the mattress fester, and she stole food from other people even though she received a $3000 a month allowance. She defecated on the toilet seat (she sat on it backwards because sitting the proper way is conforming to "social norms"), and worst of all expected me to clean it because I was "on scholarship and [her] parents paid full price!" When I refused to clean up her feces, she just left it there. I couldn't use my own bloody bathroom for over a month because of it; finally, one of the other people in the dorm cleaned it up out of pity for me. And to end this part of my story on another R. excrement moment, she video-taped herself going to bathroom and tried to force me to watch it. She stuck the camera in the toilet while she relieved herself, set the video to techno music, and turned the tape in as her final project for a sculpture class (she called it a "life sculpture"). Not only did she receive an A for this "project," she received a grant from the college to do a sculpture for the school grounds (but one not made of human fecal matter). She bought $5000 on dead grass, the kind used on hula skirts, and piled it up in the middle of the campus lawn and let the wind carrying it all over the place. She was praised for her "brilliant and innovative evolving sculpture." The groundskeepers were less thrilled than the art professors. I transferred to a different school.
Sophomore Year- Private Room in Women's Dormitory, Communal Bathroom.
This year was the closest I came to not having to share my living space with people, and so is the shortest tale. This was the first year at the college I transferred to and was very happy not to have to deal with sharing a sleeping space with anyone else. Unfortunately, I had the neighbor from hell that I had to share a bathroom with. B. was a heavy sleeper which was very unfortunate for me. You see, B. slept so heavily that she needed three alarm clocks, her cellphone alarm, and her TV alarm to wake her up, and to make sure that she was up on time, she would have them go off at 4AM so that she would be sure to wake up at some point before 10AM to get ready for class. All five alarms would go off at max volume for HOURS before she finally woke up. I tried several times to call the front desk to wake her up, but apparently she couldn't hear the phone due to all her alarms. But loudness was the least of the problems I had from B. She lived in the dorms, but she was the mother of four small children, which obviously couldn't live in the dorm with her (the school does have family housing). Her kids stayed with her mother who lived twenty minutes away, and sometimes they would come and visit her at the dorm, which I never had a problem until they started spending the night there. Babies crying at all hours during the night and her three year old son liked to roam around female-only bathroom peeping under shower doors and bathroom stalls. I never complained about it until finals week when she started smacking her son around in the hallway and locked him out of her room. The kid wandered up and down the hallway banging on everyone's door at 3AM, screaming that he was hungry. I called the police. I'm not sure what happened next except that the police knocked on her door and there was a lot of belligerent screaming and then she left and didn't come back for two days. When she did come back, she left a note on my door threatening to kill me because I was nosy and that I must hate her because she was a "rocker." Note was handed over to campus security, and she was kicked out of the university housing system. I decided apartment life was the way to go.
Junior Year- On-Campus 4-Person Apartment, Private Bedroom, 2 Shared Bathrooms.
I thought my problems would be solved when I moved into an apartment! Man, was I wrong! I first shared an apartment with T., K., and M. One of my sorority sisters had lived in the apartment before I did with the others, and she said they were all really nice. Everything went great for the first month until M., with whom I shared a bathroom, started knocking on my door every two seconds needing me to tell her how to fix her life. She was on every kind of medication available, had a really horrid family life, and didn't seem to be able to pick friends who wouldn't try to use her in some way. I felt awful for her and tried to be there for her as much as possible, but it got to the point where I couldn't go home. She would be standing at my bedroom door, crying and needing me to tell her what to do with her life. I honestly didn't know what to do; everything I suggested made her more and more upset. I tried introducing her to my friends, but it's really hard for people to warm up to you if you always start a conversation with "Do you ever wonder what it would feel like to die? Don't you just want to just die?" I suggested that she see the school's counseling service, and she did. They recommended that she spend 72 hours in observation at the local hospital's psych ward, and she did.
During the 72 hours that she was gone, K. got a new boyfriend would wanted to stay the night (which was against the apartment policy rules). He would bring his friend over, and while he stayed the night in K.'s room, his friend would sleep in his underwear on our couch. It made me uncomfortable, but I just kept my door locked and hope she would find a boyfriend without a third wheel. Well, when M. came home after her hospital visit, she was unaware of the "house guest." So when she opened the front door late in the night and a very large man in his underwear jumps out of the shadows and starts screaming at her, she was understanding freaked out. She ran to her room and dialed 911, which resulted in campus police, three resident advisors, and the real police showing up. When M. was finally assured that it was safe, she came out of her room to explain what happened. She was embarrassed and confused. T., K., and K's boyfriend decided to make an appearance at that point, and K. proceeded to go ballistic. She called M. a host of very rude names and threatened to "slit [her] throat." Normally, an out and out threat like that in front of police and resident advisors is a sure way to get kicked out of the campus housing system, but once she was reprimanded, K. turned on the waterworks, claimed to be a Freshman who didn't know any better (she was a Junior at the time), and got off scott free. M. moved to another dorm, where she went off her meds, never left her room, failed all her class, lost her scholarships, and was booted out of school.
Until the end of the semester, I had a bathroom all to myself and was left mostly alone. At the start of the new semester, C. moved into M.'s old room. She was an alcoholic 18 year old who cared more about her hair than her own safety. While suffering from alcohol poisoning and vomiting everywhere, she still insisted her friends take her clubbing even though she couldn't hold herself up on her own two feet. I had to clean up all the vomit. I applied for a new apartment at the end of the semester.
Senior Year- On-Campus 4-Person Apartment, Private Bedroom, 2 Shared Bathrooms (a different one)
I thought I had it made that year because I was living with a resident advisor. I was right!... For the first semester. No one was ever home but me. The resident advisor was always out working, one flat-mate lived at home and just used her room as a storage bin, and the other flat-mate never showed up so I didn't have to share my bathroom with anyone! Yay! But that peace would soon end.
At the end of that Fall semester, the resident advisor moved out and was replaced with another one; I'll call her N. N. didn't want to be a resident advisor; she hated the job, but needed the money for school plus the bonus of free housing. This made her quite bitter. She liked to invite her boyfriend and tons of her friends over for parties, ignoring the rules of the housing agreement because she could, and ranting at me if she thought I had broken any. She couldn't take care of herself. She didn't buy a garbage can for the kitchen, so she just used a box she found which she filled up with rotting food garbage. Finally, after the smell and infestation of gnats was more than I could bear, I had one of my sorority sisters help me move the box into the dumpster outside... which caused a thousand more gnats to fly out and attack us. Her friends ate my foods, used the bathroom I had to clean and left it a mess, and were extremely loud, obnoxious, and rude. Still, I thought I could deal with her for a semester because I still had my private bathroom... and then the others came.
P., who had been using her room for storage, got a boyfriend and needed a place where they could be "alone." I liked her boyfriend; he was polite and funny and was a great tattoo artist, but when he literally moved into our apartment it got a little much. He had a OCD and cleaned all the time, which normally would be a good thing, but finding a strange tattooed man skulking on your bathroom floor in his underwear with a rag and a can of Lysol can be a bit disconcerting. Still, I liked him better than N.'s friends, even if I had to put up with his and P1's loud sexcapades. However, there came a day when both P., her boyfriend, N's and all her friends were in the house, during which time I left to get fresh air only to return hours later to find my bathroom a mess- dirty feminine products in the floor and blood and pubic hair on the toilet seat. I put a sign on the door explaining that unless the others in the apartment were willing to clean the bathroom and pay for the cleaning supplies, then they were not allowed in the bathroom. The next day one of N's snotty friends is banging on my door asking me why I have to be such a bitch; I explain to him how I found the bathroom the day before and how I should not be forced to clean up someone else's biohazard. I also explained how if they had asked me first before using the bathroom or at least cleaned up after themselves, I wouldn't have minded them being in there (after all, if they had been courteous and respectful of my space to begin with I would have never have known they were in there in the first place). I thought that settled the matter. However, the next day, I got back from classes and my bathroom was wrecked- my hairbrush was in the toilet, all my shampoo, toothepaste, soap, and mouth wash was poured into the bathtub, my shower curtain was ripped up, and someone had pissed in the floor. My toothbrush looked suspiciously untouched, so I threw it away along with everything else. I told N. that if she didn't do something about what happened that I was going to report her to the Dean of Housing, not only for failing in her duties as an resident advisor, but also for destroying property and giving out her keys to non-apartment residents (a violation of the housing agreement). Her solution to the matter was to blame P. and her boyfriend for the whole thing, resulting in them moving out and thinking that I blamed them. I felt awful about it and never got to explain what really happened. The only good thing that happened after that was that N. stopped bringing her friends over and was never around. I got the apartment back to myself, but not the way I wanted it. I applied to live in the same apartment because N. said she didn't want to be a resident advisor anymore which means she can't live there.
So that's my story thus far. I still have one more semester to go (due to my transferring from another college putting me behind in the graphic design program at the university I go to now). I have the fear about who my new flat-mates will be. I just want someone who follows the housing agreement and is respectful of my space and the shared living space just as I am respectful of it and their space. Is that so much to ask?
And here is the updated bit about my final semester in university and the hell I endured. I cobbled it together from various posts I made during that time.
The Final Chapter (I Hope)...- the same apartment as the last one listed above.
- Xander may be a demon magnet, but I'm a bad room-mate magnet. The R.A. is drunk with power! I don't have time to explain everything (I've gotta get ready for class and Seth would kill me for being late), but let's just say that the R.A. called my mom around 10PM and demanded my cellphone number. My mom, thinking something might be wrong, gave it to her. This was not an emergency situation (I missed the first floor meeting 'cause I slept through it which lots of people do); she misrepresented herself in calling like that as well as violated MTSU's privacy policies by trying to obtain said information. She duct-taped something to my door in a childish manner then lied about doing it, and she's generally gone mad because I'm "inconsiderate" for the simple fact that I didn't rush into the new other room-mates' rooms the second they moved in to try and "make friends" with them. I'm twenty-three fucking years old! I have my own friends, and I definitely don't have time for this bullshit! Apparently, having Sarah and Tara in my room makes me "anti-social." I'm not anti-social; I just don't like you, R.A. person, for you bullying and bad attitude. I swear to God I will not be pushed around by a Sophomore.
I do get a little revenge though 'cause my mother is so pissed off about being woken up and made to worry last night by the R.A. that she's reporting her to the Housing Department. XD
- Had to meet with the director of all the R.A.s on campus and tell my side of the story. Found out that the R.A. not only claimed that I threw her hair-straightener in a sink full of water and broke it (a hair-straightener she's still using and that I have a picture of), she also claimed that I threw out all of her food from the fridge and that I stocked it full of my stuff so that she and the other roommates can't put anything in there (also that I took a picture of). The director said that our stories have too many differences so she wants to meet with both of us on Thursday, so we can basically argue with each other in front of her, I guess. The R.A.'s story's already changed a bunch of times, but they won't do anything to her. I don't want to go to this meeting (as I should be working on my comic and getting ready for Dragon*Con fun), but I know I have nothing to worry about since I know that I'm the one telling the truth. I wish it could wait until after D*C because I would rather have my James!fog to cheer me up rather than going to D*C all gloomy. My blood-pressure's way up from all this stress, and I'm somewhat sleep deprived. I hate this all together because there is no solution besides the R.A. agreeing not to speak to me nor knock on my door ever again. I don't even want to look at her.
-These are photographs I took of the apartment to document my side of what's going on with the R.A. Enjoy the batshit insanity for yourselves.
Exhibit One: The Flat Iron.
This is the flat iron that the R.A. claimed that I broke by dumping it into a sink full of water over the weekend. This photo was taken Tuesday afternoon. Note how she was still using it. I certainly wouldn't use an electrical appliance that had been dumped into water. I did not touch her flat iron at all (note the all-too-subtle message about NOT TOUCHING her flat iron).
Also note the way the flat iron precariously teeters near the edge of the counter top and how the cord is just strewn in the floor. That's safety right there! It also makes it a breeze to brush one's teeth.
Exhibit One Point One: The Countertop. All of this stuff belongs to the R.A. save the Milk and Honey handsoap which is mine keeps mysteriously moving about the counter during the day.
Exhibit Two: The Fridge. The R.A. claimed that I took up all the space in the fridge and threw all her stuff away. The items highlighted in purple are mine (note that there is space behind them). My items were added to the fridge on Friday and this is exactly how it appeared then which my mother can attest to because she was helping me unpack. Who does that other stuff belong to? I know a lot of it was in the fridge when I moved in, and since the other roommates weren't there, I can only deduce it is the R.A.'s. I don't need to keep a lot of stuff in the fridge as I have a mini-fridge in my room.
Exhibit Two Point One: The Fridge Door. None of this stuff is mine.
Exhibit Two Point Two: The Freezer. Again, none of this stuff is mine.
Exhibit Three: My cabinet. This is the only cabinet in the whole of the kitchen, including pantry, that I use. However, the R.A. still claims that I am "taking over the house."
- I'm having a panic attack literally. Oh, Lord, give me the strength not to smite the people I live with. Lousy frickin' bastards. The R.A. didn't know I was home, and I got to hear her lie to the other roommates about what I said in my emails. She said that I was jealous of her hanging out with the other two. I walked right out there and told her off. She instantly starts trying to shirk blame saying, "That's what you said in your email!" And I was like, "It was not! Do you want me to go get them right fucking now?!" She said, "Well, that's what it sounded like." Can she not fucking read?! Oh, my God. Then she wants some fucking sympathy from everyone because I was being mean. She's a fucking liar, and I'm going to the A.C. when she gets back from vacation. This will stop. I will not have it in my house. I'm losing my mind. I think I really am. I think that I'm losing all grip with sanity living in this house. Coping is not something I'm able to do at the moment. I just feel like everything's falling apart; this isn't senioritus- this is the whole world conspiring against me to try and make me lose it finally. I wish this panic attack would stop 'cause I can't breathe and I'm having some weird muscle spasms in my stomach. My nerves have finally been shot to hell, I think.
- Where's Spike when you need him? I could use some of his skills right now. Seriously. I'm in such a state at the moment that I don't know what to do! I have like four projects due next week that are huge, and I can't get any work done in the labs because I never get any work done there, and I can't get any done at home because I feel like a prisoner and it makes me six kinds of frantic. JMTV still needs to be finished, but I'm so stressed! OMG!
THE SAGA WITH THE R.A. CONTINUES.
Here's how all this began: 1. R.A. wanted to have a "house meeting," but I couldn't make it because I had class so I told her as much. I told her I would let her know a time when I could meet. 2. Instead of waiting for me to tell her when a time was convenient, she rescheduled the meeting the very next night. I told her ahead of time, "Look, I'm going to be in the lab working on Senior Project tonight. I will not be home until late." I also asked her what the meeting was about and she refused to tell, hemming and hawing around the issue. 3. Cue gigantic message scrawled on our mirror in EXPO about how she needs to know right this second when I can meet. 4. The emails began.
My email to the R.A.
Dear Amber,
My schedule is extremely hectic at the moment. Tomorrow I will be in class from 6AM straight until 9PM, and after that I will be working in the silkscreen studio, so I'm not sure when I will be home (for the past two nights, I've been in the labs until 1AM, so I expect it will be around then). I have three very large projects due next week, so I will be in and out of the apartment all weekend going to the labs/studios. I cannot skirt this studio time with these looming deadlines and I have no way to plan how long things will take me or how long I will need to be out. Definitely, the earliest I will be available for more flexible hours is Thursday and Friday of next week.
If the matters that need to be discussed at the house meeting are of an extremely pressing nature, please let me know and I will try to make some arrangements though I cannot make any set promises. However, if what needs to be discussed is not urgent, I really need to be concentrating on my assignments and studio time. Two of my projects that are due next week are group projects, and I owe it to my classmates to pull my share of the work, so it is vital to my grade and theirs that I show the proper and equal amounts of participation as everyone else.
I hope we can work something out soon.
Sincerely,
Savanna
------------------
The R.A.'s reply in all its unpunctuated glory. Notice how she carefully doesn't really answer my question about how vital the matters are.
Savanna,
well the meeting will take like 5 mins, nothing too long and we do not need to keep putting this off or things will just get worse.... there are things that need to be brought to everyones attention, as well as info that you need to know..
please let me know when you can talk to us... this week would be great...
------------------
My reply to the R.A.'s reply in which I once again ask what the meeting is about.
Dear Amber,
I really do not have time this week, and if it's something that will only take five minutes, then I cannot believe that it is something that is urgently necessary. I'm very sorry, but with my graduation pretty much depending on these classes, I hope you can understand why my priorities lie elsewhere. I'm not sure what's being going on that has turned into a dire situation. If it's about the housemate agreement thing, if you give me a copy, I can fill it out when I can and give it back to you. All I ask is that no one touch my property, i.e. food in the kitchen or my toiletries as these are the only items I keep in the common areas of the apartment, and thus far, no one has done that. If this meeting is only a sit-down meet & chat situation, then I really cannot make special arrangements for that. I'm on a tight schedule and am home for maybe three to five hours at a time, and that is the time I use for sleeping, eating, and showering.
Again, I'm very sorry. I will let you know a definitive time I can meet with you as soon as I'm sure that I will be available because I do not want you to have to keep scheduling meetings that it is impossible for me to show up for, thus taking up your time and the time of others.
-Savanna
------------------
The R.A.'s reply in which she yet again refuses to tell me what the meeting is about as well as the fact of calling me a liar about being busy because I come home to fucking sleep for three hours before I have to get up and work again.
i think that having this meeting is necessary. its not about "chatting" but about somethings that the room mates and i feel like need to be brought to everyones attention. as for the room mate agreement forms.... those are to be filled out with one another present, that way we all know your wishes on things. i do not have those forms yet but they are on their way.
i feel that 5 mins is not alot of time but that can clear up a few issues. i know that school comes first, as it should. however we have seen you come and go. and sometimes stay. you could have talked to us the few times that you have came in... i understand..... we are willing to try to find a time that is good for you. and this meeting is not pointless! i promise!
------------------
My reply in which I ask YET AGAIN about what the meeting is about and ask why she thinks it's fair that the other roommates know yet I am not allowed to know.
I will let you know when a time is convenient. I did come in today during the day as I forgot my Astronomy lab manual, but I left right after grabbing it. I was already running late and had to catch the bus when it was coming back around. I was also on the phone with my mother while you three were in the kitchen, so I was a bit preoccupied, so forgive me for not interrupting your conversation. As for any issues that are going on, I have to ask what are they? I have no idea, but it seems like you and the others have something definitive to talk about. I feel strangely out of the loop; I do not think that it is intentional, but when I have asked what this meeting is about, the issues that need discussing seem to be hedged around. There is nothing that can be discussed that can't be written, and I would just like a little forewarning. How can I deem the appropriateness of where this meeting should fall in my priorities if I can't know what it's about?
------------------
The R.A.'s reply in which she gets desperate.
somethings are just better said in person. i think that it would be the best thing. i do not want to share over email. i thin kin person would be best. i hope you understand .....
------------------
My reply in which I threaten to get the higher-ups in the housing staff's attention if I am not told what the hell is going on.
I'm very sorry, but I don't understand. If you and the other two roommates are aware of these matters, why am I the only one not allowed to know? If these issues are of such a grave nature, it might be best to have a third party present. This sounds like a very serious matter, and I think it might be best if the A.C. was a mediator again. I'll check my schedule, and then I'll see when there's a time that she can meet with all of us as a group.
------------------
The R.A.'s reply in which my threat apparently was the only way to get her to answer a simple. fucking. question!!!1!
its nothing that the A.C needs to be involved. she is on vacation.
they want to talk about food issues and air conditioner changing...and stuff like
that...
and maybe to try to get to know you. i am not sure.
let me know , ok
------------------
My reply in which I lay down the law and bring the hammer down... the hammer is not my metaphorical penis.
Amber,
Food and air conditioning? That's what couldn't be said in an email? Well, that's all you had to tell me. You made it seem like there was something seriously wrong, and I must say it is highly suspect when one asks what a meeting is about several times and is basically refused an answer.
The earliest I can meet is Wednesday (October 1st) at 7PM, no earlier/no later. I will give the five minutes you requested, but I have to leave right after to go back to the silkscreen lab as I have a project due on Thursday in that class (as well as an assignment in astronomy and a ten page paper due in Senior Project which I hope to get done this weekend but who knows). It might save some time for everyone to just say that I haven't and do not touched the thermostat, and it's fine where it is now. As for food, I don't want people touching my food, I don't touch other people's, and I haven't had any kind of problems with people in my things. And as far as getting to know me, I don't see why that is on the itinerary. Something like that would take much longer than five minutes, and also, should I not be involved in the decision who "gets to know" me? Is that not my right? The whole thing makes me uncomfortable as I am none of anyone else's concern. The food and air conditioning may be of some consequence, but "getting to know" me is an unimportant, frivolous, and wholly unnecessary enterprise and a poor excuse to deprive me of my studio time.
If 7PM on Wednesday is a problem, please let me know. The next time I could possibly meet is Friday (October 3rd) at 6PM.
- Savanna
--------------------
The main problem is that these are the types of girls who don't want to be my friend, they have no interest in being my friend, and have no interest in getting to know me, which if absolutely perfectly fine because I have no interest in being their friend or getting to know them. BUT! They can not understand that I don't want to be their friend. After all they are pretty, popular types! How dare I NOT want to be THEIR friend! *insert flounce here* So this whole meeting is a set up, and I refuse to be dragged down by this. I'm twenty-three fucking years old, I have my own friends and my own life, and I don't need this bullshit! I'm thinking about walking in and saying "Hello, my name is Savanna. I watch a lot of gay vampire porn, and I can fantasize about James Marsters naked constantly."
- Well, here's to hoping that the saga between the R.A., myself, and the roommates is over.
The R.A.'s reply to the email in which I laid the hammer down yet she's still not getting how her email was both offensive to my sensibilities and manages to try and turn this whole thing around into something about me disliking THEM. She also missed the point that I stated that I wasn't having any problems and that no one had been touching any of my stuff.
i apologize if you feel that way...i understand if you dont want to get to know
us. we just kinda want to get to know you since we all live together. i will let
everyone know your answers to the whole food and air thing. i think some
things are ust better said in person.
so i will pass it along and there is not need to have a meting......
if you get this paper done, does that mean you get to graduate at christmas?
that must be exciting! i can not wait until senior year! its going to be great! you
must be excited!!
oh and one last thing.....no one is going to touch your food and you personal
stuff.... someone just had been eating others people stuff and that was really
the issue.... but i will let everyone know to only touch their stuff......
oh and i love the thing you put on your door..... its nice to know what you are up
too!! i love it! and you are so busy!!! i never see you anymore..... [Fender would like to add: The R.A. is referring to a dry erase sign I bought for my door to denote my comings and goings since she seems to think I am in my room when I am not, which I should not have to do but it seems necessary since she keeps harping that I'm in my room and won't come out when I'm actually across campus at the lab or in class. >__<]
hope classes are going great for you and that you get the project and
assignments done!! good luck and let me know if you need anything or of there
is anything that i can do for you.
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My reply in which I desperately try to make her understand that it has nothing to do with my feelings towards them and has everything to do with the accusatory treatment I have received since living here (and how if she had been open and honest about the whole situation in the first place, we could have avoided all this stress).
Amber,
I feel that getting know one another cannot be forced nor can it happen in a
short period of time. It happens at random and is more gradual. Unfortunately, I
will most likely only be here for another two months, and all of my focus and
attention must go to school. It is not that I do not want to get to know any of
you; it's that the situation was never presented that way to me. Let me explain
my apprehension- the "meeting" was described as a chance for the three of you
to discuss things that you all have already been in talks about with me. If these
matters have already been discussed amongst the three of you before I was
even aware of any kind of problem, and I have been left out of the loop to the
point where I was never consulted as to even the time of the meeting before it
was arranged in the first place, it appears to me that each one of you have
probably made up your minds about the outcome of said meeting. I will not be a
scapegoat because I am the one who is at home the least. I've been down that
road before in this apartment, which is why I choose to keep to myself and why I
must concentrate so hard on my studies.
As far as my senior project, this ten page paper is only the beginning of the
project itself. Everything I've been working on thus far has been a group project
to design the overall theme of show, the print material (posters, postcards,
vinyls, etc), and the show's website, which is why I was gone all last week. I was
in the computer lab until 1AM every night working with the others to finish the
website- writing action script, javascript, html and css and designing the flash,
taking the photographs, and making logos. I was the only person who knew
how to write the css, so it was very stressful because people kept changing
their minds about what they wanted. And now I have to start work on my own
project for the show itself. Each person has an individual project to complete
which requires 8 pieces (website, posters, etc). It's all a huge undertaking with
only a month and a half left to complete it. Plus, there's a portfolio review in
October that I have to prepare for and all my other classes. I just wanted to
explain to you that I am not trying to avoid anyone or anything, but that when I
said that I didn't have time last week that I truly, truly meant it.
Sincerely,
Savanna
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The R.A.'s reply in which she tries to be a friendly, caring person while avoiding having to address the fact that I caught her and the others trying to pull me into a set up.
wow you really are busy,,, its no big deal, i just wanted all of us to talk.. the other
two girls knew each other... and now i am getting to know them.. they are great
girl! but i understand where you are coming from and how you feel.....
im always here, if you need anythign...good luck with all that school work...you
seem to be very focused...so good luck and i hope it all goes well
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RAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!1!!!! *pulls hair out* Why can't they just leave me alone?! I swear, I just want to be left to myself and finish out these next two months. College is not a girl scout meeting! I do not have to be friends with them! What is wrong with these people?! What the hell does it take!?
And it continued on all semester with the three of the other apartment-mates being absolute bitches to me and fighting with their boyfriends obnoxiously. I couldn't wait to get out of there. I didn't even tell them I was leaving.
I want to be a hermit.
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